Thank you for all that you uh decided to stick around and see if I made it back. Um So just who I am. So I longtime hr person, so I've been thinking about the leadership challenge for a really long time.Um And so that's when, uh when I went out on my own, why I really wanted to focus on this topic. And so I'm gonna jump right in. Um And so hopefully, um we can get some chat going up just I believe that leadership is challenging and I particularly over the past two years, I think it's gotten even higher or harder. So if you ready to just share in the chat, anything that uh you think helps make it challenging global teams, critical feedback, more geography, right? Talent. Yeah, lots of good things there. Uh Not being this me. Yeah, that's an interesting one going from an individual contributor to the, the leader. And so some of the ones, some of you have been bringing up some of the, the challenges that um I'm gonna talk a little bit about because some of the statements that I hear in talking to people is uh frustration around the team members don't want to do it your way or the way that you think might uh be most efficient, um that their team need, team members need more time than that they have available.

Um that sometimes they have, have priorities outside of work. And so they are not wanting to stay there all night or do the weekends or those types of things. Um They always wanna know how to grow and looking for those answers. Um And also then the other piece that I hear a lot of is that, you know, from that leader, I can barely handle my own responsibilities, let alone think about coaching my team. So I wonder if um some of these resonate with all of you as well. Um And so I think it's time that we change um how we enable leaders because the game is kind of changed. When you think about our traditional leadership development practices, there were in each organizations, there's a set of core competencies and capabilities, there's training workshops, uh There is little or no individualized coaching. Um They generally talk about a one size fits all approach.

Um focuses on individual goals um versus team goals which have become so important. A lot of times it's been a traditional view of command and control of just here's what the work is. Um And there's an assumption um particularly with some uh more seasoned leaders in the workplace so that people will just do what they're asked to do, um versus, you know, thinking about alternative ways or presenting different perspectives. And so that makes it hard. Um And so I think the models no longer work because I don't think there's one way, right way to lead, there might be some common expectations around, you know, we should respect each other, but how that shows up is different. And if you think about the people that we call successful leaders, whether it's across uh you know, politics or military um or communities, they all act very differently. They don't have the same way of leading. Um Each one has their own style. The other piece that makes it challenging is that each team is different. So how you lead one team to be very successful, might end up being very different from what will work or doesn't work um with another team because um you might be different from where you are in stage of life. The team members may be different.

The scenarios that you're facing may be different. And I think the other piece that is uh come to light, I think or become more prevalent over the past few years is that the leaders have realized that they've got to do some of their own individual work. And I don't mean work assignments, but more how are they going to be a successful leader for themselves? Um And some of that work really comes through doing assessments or getting um external or internal coaching around how you're showing up as a leader. And that hasn't been the traditional um uh way of leadership development programs in many organizations, some more sophisticated ones definitely have. And so I think the real reason that this is really hard is that people are messy. That's my, my tagline, people are messy and leading people is a messy job. Um And thus it takes more art than science because science would say there's a way to do it. If you follow these rules, things will happen appropriately. And we've just talked about it doesn't work that way because people are all very different. And so it comes to life because our team members aren't perfect, they're messy. We as leaders aren't perfect, we're messy. Um And so what makes this messy? My definition of messy is we all come with different backgrounds and experiences. We all are motivated differently. We have different ways of thinking and reacting. Um And so I think it's time to rethink what it takes to lead effectively.

And, you know, as Jackie says in the chat, it's not a bad word. Sometimes I thought about using this word and people may think about it as a negative. But when you start thinking about messy and I talk to, to clients and I say, well, it's hard because they're messy. Everybody goes, yes, that's it, it's messy, it's hard work and that's why it's really an art to make it work because there's not a magic formula that you can just try out. Um in every scenario, it might be different, every team member, it might be different. Um And employee expectations continue to change. So even if you've got it working, um with, at an individual level over time, the style may need to, to change. Um And so leading effectively, you know, requires a couple of things to first understand yourself your own biases, expectations and reactions, including what I call your imperfection gremlins. And we'll talk about those just in just a minute because first you have to understand you and why you have certain reactions.

So for instance, if recognition um is not a big deal for you, like you don't like to be recognized maybe publicly or um and so thus, you don't do it with your team. If you have team members that really are motivated by recognition, you may be missing out on how you're going to keep them engaged. It's also about understanding your individual team members, how they think what's most important to them, what motivates your triggers them and how to get the best from them. So this is not somebody joins your team, you give them the, the key expectations for the role and send them on their way. It's really building a relationship um with, with uh your team members. And then finally, you know, building an approach that leverages the full team's capability so that they're working to their strengths. So if you think about a sports team, for instance, um each player is bringing something uh unique to the table, um that needs to, to all come together and work together um to make the team successful. It's the same thing in the workplace.

So that, that team leader, that supervisor, that manager, part of their job is to figure out how do all these pieces fit together and get the best from their team. And so I, I mentioned talking about our imperfection gremlins and I think when we think about how we show up to lead some of our behaviors that are, may get in our way. So I've identified six, what I call imperfection gremlins. Um, the impostor which you hear a lot about, um, the controller or I want it my way, they don't do it my way of really trying to make sure things happen the way you expect them to, um, hair on fire. So that that person who's always leading up to the deadline, you know, uh, not maybe prioritizing as well, but just always in a rush, everything is always a fire drill. Um, the hero, the, the person who wants to come in and save the day for their team. And sometimes this is all, um, also the expert of wanting to show up and, and know it all. Um, the perfectionist of, you know, good, you know, not knowing when good is good enough for you as, as your individual, but also for your team members and, you know, continuing to push, um, people to the end and then finally the cookie cutter that, that manager or leader who really wants one way to work.

Um, and unfortunately, we all, you know, may struggle with one or many of these, um, over time, but there is a way to, to harness it. And so that it turns out to be the best version of you of how do you use those? Um for good. So once again, it's, there's not a recipe. Um There's not a perfect science to it, it takes um adaptation and, and creativity. And so we each have our own gremlins and so does our, each of our team members and so we have to work through that. And so it's time to harness the messy for you and your team. So I uh use a model that I call the icann model, um which I got really lucky that the, the words really played out for me. So it's really around setting the attention for how you want um to lead. What is great leadership look like to you. What are the role models you've seen where it's been really good or where it hasn't been good. Um And what's the impact that you want to make on your team? So that's the intention, that's the eye and that's where it all has to start the second piece of the C is, you know, creating the plan, um, really thinking about how you're gonna use each person's capabilities once you get to know them, how you're gonna commit to coaching them.

Um I'm a big believer of, um Marcus Buckingham's uh, statement around our job is really to make them, um, just a bit better, help them be better tomorrow than they are today. That's our role as a leader. And so we have to have a plan of how that is gonna best work for each person on our team. And so we also have to think as we focus on each individual, how do we motivate the team as a whole? Knowing that there may be different factors. How do we build that sense? Um The a obviously take action on the plan and you've got to move it forward and put it into place and put it into practice. And then I think one of the most important parts is the, is the last one, the end it's navigate. So the circumstances are gonna change. Team members will come and go from your team. Uh The team's priorities may change or the individual priorities may change, there may be external forces that show up and maybe your plan for whatever reason doesn't work as well as you want it to. And so you have to navigate and potentially reset your intentions and so that can help um move through this, harnessing the messing, uh harnessing the messiness And so I, I leave you with a question around what art do you need to add to your, to your leadership style?

So I'd love you to share any uh thoughts around the art that you would add to your leadership style or questions or feedback that you may have looking at the, the comments around complexity, continuous process. What other things show up for you? Um Being inclusive in the decision making. Yes. Which of these things do you have in practice today or that you could add or you wish your manager um would do. There's a question, how do you deal with a team member that doesn't want to be known? I mean, that's a good question. I, I think it's probably thinking through what, what's their driver if, if they don't like public um recognition, uh you can potentially avoid that. There was just more of some of the uh an email or a, a personal. Thank you. If it's more. However, if it is going to get be at a point where that person cannot progress without being recognized, you know, to a more senior leader, then that's probably a conversation you need to have with them around. Um What's their concern with being recognized, being known?

Um And what are their goals if they are content doing the role that they're doing today? Um being uh somewhat invisible um from the, the groups um and don't want to progress into a role that requires more visibility and that role allows it. Then, then we try and respect that. Um art. No, your communication style and the style beach team member. Yes. Um Always acknowledge emails from your team members. No response is ideal. Yes, great. Um One of the questions, how do you measure success as a leader? And I think that's interesting because I was having a conversation with a leader recently about um how they were being uh evaluated based from their board. And it was a question around, well, there are metrics around attrition, potentially or engagement scores, et cetera. But it, and those definitely, you know, will give you a sense of it. But I think it's more, how is your team functioning? Is your team collaborating with each other? Do, do they enjoy working with each other? Do they give their discretionary energy? Um Are they excited to do work that you're leading them through? So I think it's, it's those softer things sometimes that's more important. Um looking at some of the other questions. And so I just missed one here. Um navigating a rela relationship with manager's trouble relinquishing their control.

Yeah, I mean, I think that's a, that is a challenging one. I think one of the best things you can do is is understand what their trigger is. So if they have want a certain level of control, really understanding what is that? Um what's driving that and how can you upfront potentially meet their expectations. Um, and, and assess is it because they don't trust, um, your work product or the team's work product? Um, uh, is it, that's usually the thing is it, don't trust the work product. And so it's also maybe, um, trying to understand clear expectations up front from them. I love, I always talk about the Berne Brown painting done. So, if you have a manager that wants control, maybe having that conversation around, what does dun look like? What does good enough, you know, what's the final product need to look like so that you get that information upfront? Um And potentially don't feel like you micro manage it at the back end. Um Work with a leader never acknowledges emails of praises of the team. I mean, I think uh uh hopefully I'm not going to pronounce this wrong, but ka I think that's really hard um and disappointing and sad. And so I think that sometimes the team members have to make up for it um by recognizing each other. If the manager or the leader is not gonna do it, then making sure each person feels seen.

Um Just looking at any other questions that are in the chat, there's a lot of a good um comments and support there and I think we're gonna get cut off in just a minute or so. Um What I just wanted to close with um oops, try not to kick myself back out again. Um If you wanna hear about messy and imperfection gremlins. You can follow me on linkedin. I talk about, uh those topics quite a lot and, and have a linkedin newsletter as well as a, um, individual one. So, um, if we get cut off, um, that will be there. Um, yes, I, yeah, gay's point around you can learn from the bad leaders. I think there's definitely things that people have picked up that they're like, I don't want to be that person. I want to be, you know, the, the person that really um my team respects or my team feels like that I see them and can help them. So I think that's we, we're gonna get closed in just a minute. I don't wanna end too early. Um I'm playing for promotion but I'm being told, I'm too nice to be a leader. How do I work with this feedback? Um That, oh, I think trying to understand what they mean by too nice. Do they believe that you don't make the difficult decisions? Um Do they feel like you um maybe don't uh deal with a, a poor performer?

But I think it's really asking them, well, what does that mean? Um because I do think leaders should be nice. Um but they also have to um be assertive at times. They have to take a position at times. But uh I think sometimes there's still old school thinking on how um what leadership actually looks like And so hopefully, um, if that organization won't support you and you believe that you are the right type of person to be a leader, then then find an organization that respects a different leadership style.

We've seen, you know, loud and assertive isn't always the best style out there.