My name is Lina Zit. I'm a Q A consultant at thoughtworks. You can find me on Twitter as Baggi. Feel free to share any thoughts. Uh You find useful in this presentation and tag me if you want to.And I've been in tech for more than six years now. And let me tell you, it's not easy being a woman in tech. So today I'd like to share with you how we could help ourselves and others to make it at least a little bit easier and better. The stories I'm going to share are my personal ones plus uh from people I do know and they told them to me. So let's begin. Some may say it's not easy being a woman in tech. Why? What's not easy? Well, it's not easy when you are a tech lead and you are just being polite and you bring coffee to a business meeting and your business partners. Look at you as if you were a secretary and ask. So where is the tech lead? For some reason, you need to convince them it's not easy when you are a tech trainer and you have a programming language course online and most of the comments under it are from men about your looks how gorgeous you are. And when you actually call it out and you say, hey, this is not ok. I don't, I don't think women should be objectified. There will be men who will say, oh, this is just a compliment. Take it.

It's not easy as well because my colleague who has a perfect sight wears glasses in order to convince others that she's nerdy enough or believable or convincing enough to work in tech, it's not easy. When whatever emotion you show you get labeled as aggressive or too emotional or weak or you're basically under your P MS. And when you say, hey, this is not funny. The person says, well, you do not have humor sense and it's not easy because this is the business which has so much of masculine qualities. We see leaders who are boosting their egos or playing power games. Is there any space for feminine qualities there? We may ask and we never know if we will reach these leadership positions if this is such a boys club sometimes. So before we go into a lot of problems and how maybe we could help solve them. Let's talk. How did we get here? We have to acknowledge some history. So I collected some random historical facts. Let's go through them. In Ancient Greece, women were considered inferior species with lower intellectual abilities than Children in Ancient Rome. Women used to pass from paternal authority to husband's authority and actually, if you were a rich widow, you still had to get a guardian man. So you wouldn't lose your fortune. Roman women from early age had memorials to recognize their domestic qualities rather than intellectual achievements. Hm.

That sounds a little bit familiar. Right. And they could not have their own business. They could not express opinions, they couldn't advise their husband on what to do on certain matters because you know, they were considered, they don't have much of intellectual abilities. And let's look at some modern facts. Women were allowed to vote in most countries only in 20th century and access to education more widely spread for women in the 18th century. So then Marie Curie was one of the only women at university. There's no wonder why we don't have science role models, for example, because women were not allowed to get access to education. Even this fact is about high schools, not only universities. So for thousands of years being a woman meant being inferior. Even nowadays, the word feminine has a negative connotation. Oh, you're such a girl. That does not sound like a compliment at all because we have so much of leftovers from history which say that feminine is somehow inferior. These are some of the vintage ads that I found and they were produced not that long time ago. These are fairly modern times, 20th century. The first one says Gee, I wish I were a man. I joined the Navy, be a man and do it. The second one says show her it's a man's world and this is actually advertisement for a tie. And the third one is actually from a housewife magazine which says you'll be happier with the hoover.

So we are coming with this luggage of loads of sexism to these modern times where when it was believed that domestic horses just making your husband happy or getting a new hoover are something that combines woman's happiness. So it's no wonder when the whole world screams that we are not good at tech. We start believing even if it's not true because there were so many things in the past that we also believed, let's say domestic things that we should take care of it. While most of this came from this imagine order from societies ideologies, people as well, having certain ideas how the world should be. And the first thing that we should start with is fighting the stereotype threat, questioning internalization. There are so many stereotypes about women all around us.

And the most painful, painful part here is that we start believing them. We start thinking that they are true. We internalize this. An example of this would be an experiment that was done not that long time ago where men and women got a math task to solve. A group of women was divided to two parts group A and group B and the group A got exactly the same formulation of the math problem as the group of men, which was please solve this math problem. The second group of women actually had one extra thing which was a stereotype written on top of this page. And it said women usually underperform in math. And what do you think the results were women played the stereotype, the women that we're told just to solve the problem executed as good or even better on average than the group of men. But the women who had the stereotype, they believed it, they internalized it. So let's be careful with stereotypes and start to question ourselves. And we may say these times are way better than it was before. We don't have such sexism around us. We still have a lot of things going on and this is just the start of change and we have to continue laying a better future for ourselves and future generations, we have to question what's considered to be normal.

A lot of times we say, oh yeah, tech, you know, start ups, maybe it is about white boys playing ping pong and drinking beer. And this is just how it is. Forget how it is the world was for, for so many years built using men as default. So it's time for us to question this and actually drive change. And I love the Cyndi gallops quote which says women challenge the status quo because we never, it, we have not status quo and of course, we are challenging it and we have the power to see what's wrong with it. So, where do we start? Well, first of all, we may not have enough overall models right now. So we have to be them. It's a hard one to digest. However, there are people who are looking up to you, there are people in, even in your company who are observing what actions you're taking, how you're behaving. And we have to be the tech role models that maybe we don't have right now. As many as the first American woman in space. Sally Wright has said young girls need to see role models in whatever careers they might choose just so they can picture themselves doing those jobs someday. You can be what you can see.

Then if you cannot believe in yourself, at least trust people who believe in you. We are grown up and raised with confidence issues. When we're little girls, we are told be nice, be kind, be polite. Boys will be boys, boys will be hooligans. But girls, you know, you're, you're, you're the angel, you're the savior. And these are noble qualities and it's great that this happens. However, we grow up doubting ourselves, constantly thinking about other people's feelings or in general not doing things because we're shy. We're, we're ashamed.

And I remember one story here. I was talking to a colleague of mine who once was sharing struggles she had at her work. And she said, I don't think I'm good enough. Maybe I'm a fraud. Maybe tech is not for me. And then I asked, uh did you get any kind of feedback from your team on this? And she said, no, they, they give me the best feedback. And I said, do you trust these people? Are they, do you respect them? Are they very, very smart people in your eyes? And she says, yes, absolutely. So then I was like, hey, even if you don't believe in yourself, please believe in them because they are seeing something in you that you are not seeing, trust them, trust the friendship, trust the respect. And she burst out into tears because it was very vulnerable thing for her to hear, to realize what kind of confidence problem she has when others believe in her and she doesn't. And the one wake up call that I can uh suggest is Cindy Gallo's quote which says when in doubt, ask yourself, what would a straight white guide you? It's a bold question.

And I want to give here caution that you shouldn't do what statewide guys tend to do, but just get this perception, try to realize what's happening. An example I have is my colleague recently wrote a brilliant article. And uh before she wanted to publish it, she asked for feedback. One of the reviewers was a straight white guy and he gave so many comments. This reminds me as well of one quote saying why sometimes men think that the, the article we share is the first draft because they give so much. So then she got so many comments and feedback from this person. She started doubting herself even more. She said, maybe I should have published this article, maybe it's useless. And then I asked her, what would this very same person do if you gave as many comments to him? And she said, well, he would push back. He wouldn't care, he would just get it published. And I was like, you see, he would get it published. So maybe we should do as, as a straight white guy could you, but it's perspective, at least you keep on doing. You don't want to do it like a dude. However, you also don't want to do it like a woman when that is understood as not doing things at all or thinking about everyone's feelings. Unfortunately, in current society very often doing it like a woman is not doing things at all or considering everyone's feelings.

And we have to change this perception and we have to somehow find our own ways of doing things. And I'm not a fan of saying just lean in or just be aggressive and go do it. That sounds for me like doing it like a dude. But I must tell you don't simply just lean in trying, please, please do it. Don't give up your own way, the authentic, real vulnerable way because that is courage and that is what we need in tech. That is what kind of leadership we need. We need empathetic leadership with heart. We need different qualities, not just ego or power games. Uh And as our friend, Ku says, I don't want to be a part of a world where being kind is a weakness. I don't want to be a part of a world where being feminine is a weakness. It's not, it's a strength and we have somehow to embrace it and be a role model for others. How it is a strength. Speak up. If we don't talk about problems, we face men won't. This is extremely difficult when you are the only woman in a group because men simply may not believe what you're saying. But we as a collective have to speak up. We have to find ways mediums to speak up about issues. The one example I could give is everyday sexism. There's a huge account and there was a book as well where women share what's happening in the world and the things that for them first were normal.

Let's collect the old challenges we have for the status quo and speak up and talk about it. And the other area here that we sometimes are not um covering women's problems as much in is journalism in journalism. There are not as many articles about women's problems because often men, men are not facing it. And most of the heroes in media are men for some reason. So let's try to raise our voices and try to make the problems more visible. Maya Angelo has said each time a woman stands up for herself, she stands up for all women. This reminds me of a saying that if you are about to get hired and there is a negotiation of your salary as a woman especially ask for way bigger salary than you would normally ask. Maybe you should ask, what would the straight guy would do? And um then try to ask for something that maybe would even make you burst out laughing. Why? Because when the company you get hired to is looking at the reports of salaries, they do not see the pattern of women always earning less. They wouldn't draw conclusions that women are somehow worse. We have to stand up for each other in order to stand up for all women exercise your privilege, support other women.

I understand that we all may have worked really hard to get where we are, but we have certain privileges and we have to acknowledge them even access to this conference is a privilege. There are a lot of women who are not able to do that. There are women who are looking up to you in your company and you could help them out to achieve their goals. And we have to lend up a privilege and help each other very often. We are a little bit conflicting because we tend to make it hard for other women because we had a difficult don't do that, try to support each other because especially you do understand how difficult it can be. Mona Al Tahoe has said the privilege of education, of work, of being able to travel freely, obliges me to fight 10 times as hard as women who don't have that privilege. Remember this, we all have certain levels of privilege and we can fight, we can speak up, we can lend our privileges to others, mentor and get mentored. You are someone's role model because we have so many confidence issues. Sometimes we doubt ourselves. And if we have something to teach others that we do, there are so many programs where we could find a mentor and as well mentor others. The funny thing about mentoring is it never goes alone.

Once you become a mentor, you also get mentored because you learn and you grow a program I could suggest to you is a free mentoring uh club and I am one of the mentors as well. So feel free to arrange a session with me or become a mentor or check out other mentors and it's a great growth opportunity. Lastly, tell your heroes that they are them and express gratitude. You may be someone's role model and not know it same way your role models may not know it. So today, tell them that they are your heroes, express gratitude. And I want to take a chance here to thank my personal heroes. I want to thank my mom. I want to thank my friends Margie Indre Nadine Fernanda and Amala and a lot of other women who shaped my journey and where I am today. And most importantly, I would like to thank you for attending this talk for being here and thanks for listening. I'll switch the other tab before I do. Uh I want to show you some reading recommendations that I definitely would suggest. These are some great books that can give some new perspective. Um Are there any kind of questions? I don't know, it would be great if you could, but what bothered you?

I don't know what was, oh, it said the mentoring club, I as well have a, a slide with the references if you want to take a quick uh screenshot and there is a link to a mentoring club. Thank you for attending this. I, oh, how do you stay positive? If you don't stay positive, you get angry. Um It's extremely hard. Uh And the one thing is we have to cho choose our battles, we have to choose our fights. And um and basically, the positivity may not be always there. You may be hurt, you may need to take a break. You may need to think how you should tackle things like that because there's daily sexist behaviors all around us. Thank you all for attending. Um Feel free to contact me. I can share the slides as well. I I can share the recording when I have it. Um Yeah, thank you all. If there's no more comments, then have a beautiful day. Bye.